mrenigmatic

2007-08-13T05:37:00.000-07:00

Hmmm ... and again Am on my way to another trip across the coastal belt ... this time to a place well known for its troubles, busniessmen , business and wealthy men and women and ofcourse the Temple of Goddess Durga ... a new pack has been launched and ''time for us to gather new markets and new 'territories'' as my managers yell , the pack needs to be given a grand launch and I seem to be the most important entity along wid my salesforce too, atleast for now , to help it gain some kind of market ! Hmm ... in sales ur always important every time u sell and help the lean curve go up the graph ... and the moment that bloody curve begins to crawl downwards ...u would be at the receiving end and God Help !!! Pray that u'd atleast be left with your Ego to continue ahead !

Sales ... , sales never improves or moves away from being critical, complex and compulsory to attain and achieve ! Almost a week there(the Town), would or should probably help us gain something over the ''Nothing'' that we already bost of, in that area, and so its time for me to once again Re-charge my gotten old, rusty, unwilling, energy batteries and 'start' the 'game .

God help ... and I would do my best yet again, for there is one thing that would always wana make me do the best ... The Ego , The Pride , and The Name ofcourse and more than anything, The Satisfaction of giving the best and getting back to my bed to have a sound sleep !

I would ofcourse miss my HQ(Read Head Quarter Town ) , the beach , the late night rides , The ''bird watching'' and the Lonely Nights, watching Movies at my Aptmnt. Well ... thats the way it is, then thats the way it would be ... and I promsie I 'd back with a Bang !!! God I love arnold and his 'Astha La Vistah Babey' ... Ciao Amigoz ... keep smilin ...

Walk and Walk ... Jus Keep Walking and Walking

2007-06-27T08:31:00.000-07:00

Hey All been a long while ( now the phrase seems cliched for certain !) , the last two days in Hyd (Went for a meet cum leisure) have been something, that failed to leave a mark , except for the fact we(Team) sat listening to the bosse' and their boss talking ... Hmmm I thought I was the ONLY one who does the talking ! At a point during the talking that was on , I felt '' Man, wat this world made up of ... is life just about waking up running and running and then going back and then waking up again and then running and running again , but ONLY this time, people expect u to Run Faster and Better !'' I am talking and tryna understand the 'factor' and phenomenon called Sales , nothing is ever the best in Sales , nothing is ever permanent in the so called Sales profession and Nothing , Trust Me would ever change the Way Sales Functions, simply 'cos the one way to better wat u already did yesterday is to do it better today and do it much better tomorrow and on it goes , no end , no 'rest' , No Certainity jus keep on and on ... Walking and Talking, U understand wat I mean, I hope ! Sometimes jus some of the many times , I feel like I have been 'burned' off and there is no more 'energy' to RUN , and that I need some 'Rest' , a break , a change , a relief , and that I wud be transfered magically to a place where u jus don even think and jus be ... I mean JUST BE ...

Last week I have seen a movie that runs on ideals, which many a men( and Yes Woman too ) , wud wana emulate, the Movie ''SIVAJI'' , that stars Rajnikant, the Superstar ... Hmmm guess No !!! The superstar' Superstar, the man has begun to knock the foundations of many a super stars and I am sure thats not the end.Otherwise I thought the film had a good motive a fine script, but a little lack of screen play and editing, hey but who the fuc cares as long as it does thrill u and the heroine for the first time since she made a debut some five years ago, seemed attractive and for once I thought I should change my mind and ask her for a date !

Hmmm now how do I end this post ... Ah Yes, I would pray and wish the rains that seem to create a bit of havoc have mercy and may God save the lives of the people and have mercy and not punish the world for the sins that some men/ women commit! That's the least I could do and may God Blezz Ya All ... and a note please be a bit careful and drive carefully on the roads, carry a rain coat, avoid the rain and call ur bloody boss and tell him that it wud not be possible to do the field work since its raining heavy ! Any Good Boss wud understand , My Bosse' do understand ...Thank You Have Fun Adios ...

2007-01-16T08:14:00.000-08:00

Hmmm ...

2006-11-13T06:32:00.000-08:00

Hmmm ... the word / expression (Hmmm!) seems to be one thing am left with these days ... Its been quite a Long Time since I have typed something on here , Well , call it as you may Lethargy or Laziness or just BOTH ! Loneliness has taken its Toll ! Amidst Hectic work , Impending Challenges , a little bit of Craziness , a want for something or is it Someone ??? , and an Uncertain Mind - Set , am at the least eligible to say Hmmmm ... and keep Hmmmimg on ...

Man what is it with me or people like me ...they never are sure about somethings , Hmmm anyways otherwise Life' s Treating Yours Humbly Amply Fine . Been Reading a book or Two one a Wild West Mystery and another on something that would grab the attention of the most powerful piece of Land in the World - Terrorism , been a long time since I watched a Movie in a theatre , watched one yesterday a seemingly hillarious comedy a Hindi Flick ... was Ok ! Probably I would have had more fun if I had gone with a Bunch of my Pal - Folks .

Workwise the Third Quarter (the 7,8,9th Months ) has ended and the 4th almost Midway before it hands over the ''Batton'' of change to the Next Year, I guess some good understanding and planning with in the next few weeks would help most for the coming Year Ahead ! And am quite bored about Work too , Looks like I need to get on into the James Bond Garb - if you ask me two reasons for that , One - Lot of Adventure and Spin about around the world at the cost of Her Majesty's Treasure Chest or is it Mrs Boroccoli ' ...Two Hmmmmm My Favourite - The Gals ofcourse ... most befitting ones with the most curvacious bods that would belt any MAN out his sane senses ! Some One out there hear me Out ! LOL !!!!!!

Astaa La Vista !!!

2006-09-11T10:25:00.000-07:00

''Aasta La Vista Babey'' ... Scorns Arnold Schawaznegger in a film that grossed millions and made him the highest paid entertainer ... and this is what I would always want to say to My Blog , for I am always 'so near yet so far'from it that I tend to be irregular @Blogging ... So here I am ... back , back after a long Hiatus ? back with a bang ??? I don't know ...but here I am , back ! ... Life and Work have been real pushy and hectic ... There are so many things I wish to put on the pages across to lighten my mind and highten my heart and yet there seems to be, no WILL to do so , here I got some time and am there again rolling , strolling ... Offlate work has been so immensly demanding that I began to see what it takes to be a MAN at work ... Sales has always been preceeded by Hope and Succeded by Pressure and probably sometimes Despair and sometimes Success .

Sometimes My mind endlessly travels across to the past where I started off as a hard core salesman ( I was Proud of it for sure ! ) and had faced immense dis-satisfaction at work and away from it too . Somehow I managed myself out of it ...and perhaps left the work for Good . Alot has happened between then and now ...a lot that has helped me get better saner and stronger ... I wish and believe that every man/woman should have the pride in what ever they do and perhaps be candid enough about it . Some day perhaps I would walk across, the same road I walked years before as a 'small' guy , as a 'BIG' man !!! There is a lot fun in dreaming , I believe you should dream too and yeah ...DREAM BIG ...ADIOS !

Been A long while Now ...

2006-06-21T03:05:00.001-07:00

Its been quite a Long while now ... somehow I was not able to plant in a post , all the while I can say I was kinda busy ... well work for certain has changed a bit , something has happened in the last one month or so ... I seem to be a lot more calm , cool and patient which is very unusual for my kinda genetic make - up ! Perhaps I am now understanding the 'world' better and am able to reciprocate well . Perhaps this is what every experienced manager would expect from his sub-ordinate ... and perhaps this is what could actually make a MAN out of every aspiring kid in the corporate world. Work apart , personal Life has nothing special in its menu ... as usual the same 'meal' , nothing spicey happening !Oh btw I have been reading a blog by an IIM girl for quite sometime now , pretty worded but upfront and bold , makes an interesting reading spare a few highs and lowz , thats been for sometime my reading pleasure... thanks to the girl ... Hmmm I was kinda always wanting to know what the make - up of an IIM girl is like , Quite curious to understand the mental set-up and observe how She/He differs from the 'common' Mba grad .

I ended up meeting one of my Mba Juniors ... man , trust me the world does change fast ... this guy is wed now and feels great about it ... I was like jolted out of the blue, learing about his new avatar , that of a household man ... I used to see this guy, as a kid running here and there asking us, the seniors, doubts , tips and Books ! Now I guess , may be I could take some guidance from him ! Anyways I asked him whether has was happy as a married man , he replied in the affirmitiive and that brought about a smile on my lips ... not met many who marry young and remain happy for long ! Time changes many things , lets hope certainly NOT some things !

Otherwise am leading the Life of a saint ... hmm I mean that of a mendicant who has not yet 'scented' a woman ...u know what I mean ! Work is helping me come across a varied section of folks , who certainly are unique... U see in business one tends to meet ppl who do NOT fail to amaze one ! Am learning and observing from these 'specimens' , it helps a lot both professionally and personally !

About Sex... welll don't ask ... it should always remain a ????? Trust me conserving one's Bio- Physical Energy helps in many ways ... and who said that ??? ... don't know just heard it from somewhere and , yea 'Conserving' the same for a long period can be a disaster ! I bet the experts would agree with me! Adios ... Asta La Vista ...Amigo

Hmmm ... sometimes I am like this !!!

2006-04-20T08:45:00.001-07:00

Hmmm ... I just am going through the same kinda feeling that I went through not many days ago ... a little bit ill, weary, easily tired, running nose , aching body parts , heavy head and a restless mind ... whats worse among the above said ailments is certainly the last ... and its been my favourite since my school days . Somehow I always succumbed to that trait , I guess its in my veins , strongly placed and structured... anyways I know my body mechanism well enough , few days from now ... I would be fine again... yes... coming to My Job , somethings not right about what s going on now ... First Quarter was good , in fact am being modest it was better than just good! But certainly not the HUGE HIT am planning before the year ends... second quarter is on ... first month , am going like how many would ... slow , cautious , depending on the same formulae and tricks... in sales most of the times , its how well u recognize ur so called major 'contributors' of growth and how well u 'handle' them to get u 'home' . I guess a little effort here and a smart working on the numbers there would see me off to a second quarter victory. But ...something , something ... is trying to get into mind...I still can't 'hear' what its tryna say ... somthing that wants me to be way better than what am now ... this is not me ... certainly not ... I never , as a school going kid or as a grad, was satisfied or went home by just doing what everyone did to finish the day off ... I always had a way of being different and creative ... never was the routine guy , never the common types , and never ever the usual formula follower ...'cos that did not make me happy or satisfiied , I just could not follow what others did ... call it my egotistic nature or my unusually self - proclaimed mentality about someone being different from the normal folk .... I still remember , back in my Mba , when we were asked to try and make an ad about a new product to be introduced into the market , everyone else went for a toothpaste , a fruit juice or something that can be bought with 10 bucks with ease ... and guess what me and my team went for ....a bloody hot fcukinggggggg damn convertible car , a two seater ... and wait for the surprise ...it wud run on just Solar Power !!! Hmmm ... sometimes just sometimes , dreams do need to have a limit !!! But thats the part about school ... there is no fear , no mental block , no doubt ... just freedom , freedom to express the thoughts and feelings ... as we gain intelligence we are 'chased' by fear, mystery , doubt ... which eventually 'slow' down our performance and create a kind of friction and ultimately may lead to something close to what u can call .. FAILURE ! I neva was doubtful about anything during that period of my Life ... except ...except for may be one thing ...the thing that always caused a doubt ... thing about girls... I neva could know what is it in me or in a girl that made me inert... paralysed , loose my equlibrium , I neva had a girl friend then ... though I tried...well u can say I neva tried much ... why ???? don't know why ...may be I was not putting enough 'punch' into my trials... not putting enough interest and enthusaiasm and may be I neva could find the Ms. right ....ohhhhhhh, How Naive I was ... I was so naive to not know that there is no Ms. right ... Life is a compromise ... and everything in Life is a compromise ... perhaps I just was not old enough to realise that ...anyways I did come across few girls ...but they were like one time 'sparks' not the ever burning 'lamps' ... some I could not keep pace with and some I neva felt like they were 'fit' for me ... but as I look back the one thing I would regret about ...is not having a gf ... holy fuck ... I made a mistake then ...but then I always consoled my self ... ''if u need something u got to sacrifice another'' ...so there I was, earning awards , beating other guys in competitions , winning accolades, a pathetic assole ... who just always told himself that he always was a great guy and he could always be alone and happy... Nope ...I was wrong , perhaps I guess I knew it then itself that I was ... but may be I just hid it from 'myself' ... men sometimes try to 'escape' from the a reality and it s real worse when they try... 'cos they are damn bad at doing that ....ufffffff sorry guys but we are all same when it comes to few things ... and yea that does not make the girls out there any better... they too are the same , except that men cry to themsleves.. and girls cry to their bedroom walls or may be to the other girls ... as I ponder now ... I believe there are a lot many thingt I need to Equip Myself with... for one .. RESPOSIIBILITY ... am working for an mnc ... and I better be responsible and be a better professional than the others ... and two ... get mature ...more mature I mean ... think less and just work more... and last ... better get back to that 'kid' that I was ... that kid who always stood up when others just sat , that kid who always walked when others just stood , and that smart kid who ran when everyone else just walked ... that kid that I always loved to be ... and will ever be ... for someone out there ... I think I need some company ... some good sweet company ...u know what I mean ...now time for me to end the emotional talk lolllllllllllsssssssssssss ... sometimes ....just sometimes I am like this ... adios amigo !

2006-04-07T01:32:00.000-07:00

To sit and relax is one thing ... To sit and ponder is another ... To sit and sit is something I seem to be doing all the time !!!!! I have a feeling am getting older and older and slower by time...fcukkkkk ! What s happening ... am I this slow , this laid - back , and this inert ! As I tend to look at the past 8 months or so, ( This is the Ninth Month in the company ) I think I have been miserably lucky to 'escape' the results of my inert and forgetful nature ! But as the say '' mistakes multiply and achievements ONLY add '' I am now facing the mistakes of my past negligence... and they seem ' heavier' than before... anyways that helps me reflect, reflect - like am doing now , reflect , recorrect and restructure my workings , I just hope this month helps me get better and be more a pro than an amateur ! Thats regards the work , as for personal life... I am still the same non - moving , inert, laid - back, unevolving kid growing up to be a MAN !Come to think of it ... I am sometimes feeling the same way I felt when in graduation - clueless ! Clueless about what I should be and what I need , perhaps am just thinking much more than I normally should ! Perhaps everyone faces this phase in Life, perhaps this just happens all the time ! I just don't know , what else to do ... and I guess I just don't know what else to type too !

anyways ... time changes things and helps better situations , Lets see ... am waiting though .... am waiting ...

After a long gap !

2006-03-19T02:58:00.000-08:00

I am here , after a long gap... sometimes, times never let one realise how LIFE runs , had been very busy for the past some days , lot of work , lot more of preparation and yes unparalled expectations ... finally I think I got a breather in the form of a sunday or is it just another day that has to pass by before the work beckons ??? I am here typing something , something that I don't realise ... yesterday hosted a party and a break , my colleague invited us to his home , it was a celebration for his b'day , we had some nice chat , my Boss was there too , five of us three officers and two managers , they drank, except me and a manager , me , cos I never drink and the manager cos it had some thing to do wid the day ! Had some home food after a long time...how I wish I have food made at home ... I was rather amused and happy to see the way my colleague and his wife talked , they were more liike friends than a couple , relations... between two people can never go greater and closer than what a freindship can take , marraige is great , but I guess one needs to mature enough to take that step and by mature I mean not just in age but also in mind and thought ,...towards the end my boss left with his family and just before I was to make my exit , my fellow officer's wife smiled and suggested that I get married ...lol all because I said that I am torn between work and fun and that its been ages since I had some good healthy food... man , I just said NO ... marraige ain't for me ...atleast now !!! But she sayz... one would never know what one could find if one gets married , well ... I always knew what I wanted ... getting married is a long way from now ...I guess I am not mature enough to take on a marraige and handle it, I guess I am earning good but I ain't so BIG in mind to handle a companion NOW, I need a lot of time , and as for fun and gurls... I guess I am always ready !!! And about good Food
, I guess I wil take care of that too... may be, just may be I would get someone who would cook good food for me (laughs) , and what would I do in return , hmmm tough proposition , may be I would take her out and have a great time ...U know its good to always DREAM ... Dreams take you to UTOPIA, I just hope some dreams do come true ...now I guess its time to wake up and get away from the blog lol... I ned to eat some good food !!!You guys out there have a great time and eat good !

A Trip to Future Glory !

2006-02-25T05:57:00.000-08:00

Am back again ... here at my HQ , a trip to Rajahmundry ( a place known for the Godavari River and yes the best green places ) few days stay there trying and hoping to build some market and gaining some share... and then an immediate trip to Hyderabad ... for a meeting of course ! Ohhh How I Love this Place...I just Love it ...it brings back to me those times and memories...times that were not so easy, not so pleasant, and yes very tough , also times that were sweet, that were nice, and that taught me a lot . I Love hyd for several reasons ...and I fail to know how many and why! May be 'cos some of the toughest learning times happened to me there...may be 'cos some seemingly sweet memories come back to me...may be 'cos I just relate to it so much... and may be just more ...I don't know and I would not wana too...anyways hyd got me to once again show case my self and my ability and I guess I did well in my presentation at the meet ...it was more on how and where I got to take my businesses across the coming year '06 and by how much would I score over the past year ... coming to think of it sales is always about scoring more and more and more even if there is nothing more to score!!!

Am back here again ...hungry for a good sleep a good rest and may be some good 'company' ... come to think of it girls are no longer in my head ...awww how can that be now ? I was so much into getting to know the work that I almost have forgotten da single most entertaining and everlasting factor - gurls ! Ofcourse I keep in touch wid a few over the phone particularly one , but that s ok ...I guess I need to climb higher now ... month end ( synonym for month - end sales review !) is coming ...which means I got to prepare again on my sales...ohh gosh ...the more I wana get away from the word the more I hapopen to use it ! And then there is a branch level meet @Chennai ... and that wud be BIG ...I mean Real Big ! God Bless ! The coming months would be trial testing my abilities and making a ground for my higher -ups to 'watch' my performance and review me ... that sorta gets mices running in my stomach ...but hey ... what fun wud work be if there s no Tension, Pressure and Challenge ! I am willing to 'play' the best innings ... I just hope the bosses watch out ... they wud not wana take a break when I am standing there at the 'Crease' heheheh... and wat am I gona do now ...saturday eve...well... got no gurl wid me now...so no way I can get into a Pub... may be a Movie...or may be jus hang on to the Comp ...lol ... guess I need to chuck out ... c ya ltrz .

If u wish to face 'pressure' ... don't feel it just fcuk it !

2006-02-17T00:38:00.000-08:00

Imagine urself involved with two or may be three chiks that u love the most and each of them knowing the fact...and each of them wanting u (rather a piece of u!!) and that u can NOT choose just one !!!! And neither can U get away ...cos ya fcking Love them or want 'em...what wud ya do... and what wud I do ... ????? God help me ! I wud wana be in that situation more b'cos that would make me feel like, am one helluva Cassanova! But I cud give it a toss too ... cos I know I could just literally get smacked down ! Talking about chiks(My seemingly FAV topic!) , my adrenaline is always on the high...but right now it ain't chicks ...it's about My Goal...My work ...My targets ... My whattafcukever...I now realise what pressure feels like ...few hours ago I happened to converse over the phone with My Boss ...and two minutes into the talk ...we were sparring at each other ...words...syllables...preferably...heated ones...I finally had what u can call a spat wid my boss...reason...he expects me to be the God and be present everywhere and accomplish just about everything...Holy Goddness, grace me !!!!!!! What am I supposed to say ... I for the first time ever 'voiced' out my concern...and yes I did shout' loud' enough for him to 'calm' down...I went like ''what wud u expect me to do ...if U want me to achieve the whole OPL( Target/Plan) in one gulp!'' ... The Story goes like this ...yes'day I get a call from my operational( Rememeber I got THREE bosses!!!) boss ...he sounded so very urgent and important...and I was made aware that I had to cancel all my further trips to any place across the territory and stay put at my HQ(Head Quarters) and that he would appreciate if I cud meet him at his house in the morning at 8 am !!!!!(thats the usual time I get wake up !) and so there I was 15 minutes before , a blue moon sorta thing for me ,but I made it there...and I was told about an important operation that would be in place come the next week...here I was, motivated , pumped up and geared and yes confused...cos I had a lot to do in the two important places of the territory which meant the most for my business...and here I was ...scouting and counting up a third... hmmm there I was trying to squeeze a lot of time 'space' and yes LUCK! I need time ...a lot , space ...yes ...some space my bosses would 'gift', so that I can rearrange my working method and analyse my priorities , and yes LUCK in immeasurable volumes !!!!! In Sales its always not the ''best'' and the ''first'' , but its best and first compared to someone and something else ... @relative ...Einstein had the brains to accalim it loud to the world decades ago ... pity most salesmen don't realise it as soon as to understand the process of it ... Coming months are going to trial test my Grit , Courage , Determination and a lot more ... I am just willing to pit myself against time ... and wait , to see if I am what I really think I am ! As for Pressure , I hope it comes all loaded , heavy and Real Hard ... 'cos I am all guns ready ... after all how many times in Life would one get a chance to proove himself great ...not many , I believe not at all many ... months from now I am gona be here , writting a story... one that would speak loud of what Grit is about , what Sheer Determination is about and what Raw Courage speaks about...a story that can help make me a better and a more assured man ! Wait for it!!!

VALENTINES - DAME' TIMES

2006-02-14T00:51:00.000-08:00

What would you do if you were stranded between two or may be three things that you would desperately want , but pity you have the choice to get just one !!!!!!!!!!! About 95% of the people would sit there pondering what to choose, what to opt for and finally end up with neither of the things ! Among the rest 5 % , atleast 4 % have an equal chance of taking the WRONG one ! Talking about that rare category of 1% ... bastards...they are always damn perfect...dead right and terribly Lucky! They just get all of them !!! A whole era of one's life is spent about 'getting' into that 1% category ... wonder how many make it into 'that ' ... I , all my life have been desperately wanting to be into that...But fcuk my luck ...never made it there lol . I guess I would keep on trying to get there...perhaps one day I might just get there ! Today happens to be Valentines Day... God bless...all lovers and the so-called lovers ... about guys like me ...guess we could just spend the day working just in case we have some ...or just sit there and not think its a Valentines ... I was sitting at a Coffee Shop and happened to realise it was indeed Feb 14 th...Holy Heavens...I have never been excited about feb 14 th all my Life...Don't know why ...may be 'cos I just did not how to make 'use' of it ...or may be I just did not have someone to 'burn' my bucks on ...on this 'auspicious' day ...or may be I was God Damn Lucky not to have a Girl Friend...Trust me ...I am not aware of what the word actually means ...True...Girl Friend...for me is a girl who is a friend or a friend who happens to be a girl!...perhaps I could be rated among those people who the world would acclaim as ''Morons'' ....Awww ... that makes me laugh.... Moron...the commonly used word borrowed from the US of A which our own Desi chaps use either to showcase their knowledge about the exsistence of USA ! or just to be associated with the ''Yo Mann! ...we Cool! ''hep types and ofcourse some use it to intend the right meaning , well, as u know the world ain't devoid of the 'represenataives' !. Talking about girls... I knew a girl...I mean I do know her even now of course ( God help me !) who was real cute (was she ???)...I mean real good, nice and may be you should just take help of the dictionary beside for more words...All I could get out of her for all the months I knew her was may be some phone calls ... hmmm let me say few not some ! and ofcourse few graceful occasions when with all my inborn intelligence I could just get her to meet me ...you would laugh if I were to tell ya on what reasons I could get her to meet me ...of course it was never the regualar 'CUP OF COFFEE' style ...Trust me I wasn't the sweet smiling cool charming hunk , I mean I can smile sweet alrite , and yes I can be charming but somehow I can never get myself to act as one wid a gurl !!!... I was more like the raw meal than the multi-cusine from the heavens...lol I laugh a lot as I replay those 'memorable' days ... I was damn outright , terribely honest for a guy trying to impress a girl and astoundingly upfront and too 'raw' for a gentleman ...heheh. Hmmm...but then that was me ...and I prided myself for being so...but in the heart of hearts ... I was a child...a mere simple boy next door...someone who was all ready to impress and take care of his 'lady'...but ofcourse that never was shown and I never wanted to show it the world...they say guys like me are rare...'cos they are just not sure about what they should be ! lol...hell, care a dime about those who say that ...anyway about this girl... I was like ...I mean I was ...stupified and stumped ! Never sure as to how I cud approach her and never sure as to what I would wana talk with her and worse of the worst NEVER SURE about what is it that I wanted from her , was it Love , infatuation, care , company , chcolates??? , toffess??? atleast money ??? ...heavens grace me ...I was never sure...that money part I was sure... I neva would get into a relatiuon ship for Money ...lol that s not in my Blood ! And so on the time passed 3 months , few months, an year , a little more than that and finally two years !!! I look back and think about what kinda guy was I, that I could not get to talk to her as much and meet her as much and I always laugh at the mere thought of going out for a movie with her ...fcukkkkk!!!! and that thought , is still a dream ...not that I care an inch anymore now...I have left that story go by ...bygones are BYE Gones , I once happened to ask her out for a movie...and she squeezed out a wonder'fool' reason... that she had to teach her bro some study stuff that eve ! And many months later I came to know that she was not sure if she cud come with me to a movie...I felt bad...I would have felt less bad if she said that b4 , when I first asked her out a NO cud have torn through cardiac muscles like a piercing arrow ... but I cud have taken the bloody pain then( sometimes u just ain't that lucky to decide when u wana loose even !) ...and now , as I ponder about what went wrong or what did not go RIGHT! Trust me , I am still CLUELESS ! She did have a boyfriend ( I don't understand who a boyfriend is ... a Lover , A guy who just happened to attract a gurl or some one who is a 'pitstop'until the next 'pitstop' !) , she later said they broke up ...huh... things like these happen ... not bad ...but what is sad is that they happen too fast and too many times to the same person... I been hearing such 'stories' from my kid days ...made me loose 'trust' in something called LOVE ( IF IT SO DESERVES TO BE KNOWN as), I fail to understand what kinda relation is that , when a guy and a gurl call themselves gf-bf , I lost on that count...I no more believe much on that ...I do believe Love can happen... and I wud be the first guy standing there to see if it can happen to me ! But what wud u or I call a thing that happens to a gurl or a guy when he/she breaks up on a little more than a few realationships ! Certainly Not Love... 'cos for me Love is something that can happen and stay forever and not just disappear...I now think I cud have been lucky when it came to this gurl ... for one I was not sure what was it I wanted ... two... I was not sure if she were the right one if at all I wanted her to be mine ! And three FRIENDS IS FINE ... A LITTLE MORE THAN FRIENDS IS ALMOST A WINE THAT LEAVES UR SENSES ON THE NEXT MORN RUN! ADIOS ...

FIGURES & NUMBERS !

2006-02-08T06:47:00.000-08:00

Hmmm ... a lot has has changed in the past one month , I got worse , and then worser and may be real bad at Numbers...got to know more about what I should be doing as regards Numbers ... I mean I have been doing numbers ...achieving them ,gaining on them ...but what I have not been doing is not knowing which number comes from where... in a layman's lingo which product of mine contributes how much and when and from where ... its like ploughing the field hard , very hard ...but just not knowing where one should sow which seed and from where comes which crop... if you understood what I am trying to say , well and good if you did not ...please don't ask me anymore ... that s the best I can do ... Now , at the beginning of Feb , I find myself wanting in a few more aspects , numbers for one - where , how , how many , and how best ! But I do believe I am better off than when I first started , people now expect a lot from me ...or am I wrong here ? In sales people expect a lot more than just a lot from just everyone !!! Well.. forget about others ...about me ...I got some hard target to hit... that reminds me of Jean Claude Van Damme @Hard Target (The Movie)...Man this guy's great ...I admire him ...The Movie was top class...a real piece of John Woo in the making ... ooops wat am I talking , heheheh sales to movies quite interesting! My Hard Target? ... is quite hard...in fact very hard ...but what is it about me ... I always am Motivated , Driven , Hard core , Propelled when it comes to Challenges...God given right I think ...its in the breath and blood... I am more than excited about the coming months ...because they would test my grit , strength , will and yes my ATTITUDE.

Talking about my personal Life...I guess there is nothing called personal these days for me ...no fun, no entertainment, NO GURLS !!! What am I doing ...without these ? People do have fun...what am I having ??? I guess I will get my day too , until then I would wait and go on about my work and my Life ... and you people out there take good care of yourselves and yea don't forget to have FUN ! Adios... Amigo

WITH GREAT POWER COMES GREAT RESPONSIBILITY !

2006-01-06T06:15:00.002-08:00

I sometimes...no most of the time recollect the movie SPIDERMAN... I always relate myself to that movie and to the dialogues in it...the one that caught my attention and always resonates in my mind is ...''with great power comes great responsibilty''...somehow the dialogue gets my adrenaline pumped and gets my emotions to peak...makes me think HIGH , BIG and sets a rythm in me .Incidentally thats perhaps the most impactive dialogue Toby Maguire says as the movies draws to a close...I guess I am experiencing a part of that statement...power and responsibilty ... how true , both of them go hand in hand...I have never seen any man survive a great name and a greater fame with complete power but no responsibiltiy with respct in that regard , neither have I seen any gain the same with great responsibility but no power...Power makes one mad...no mad is a very decent word, perhaps insane would help it or is it barbarious??? Now that sounds good enough!!! Power changes the attitude and the persona, intrudes into the values and ethics of a being , tilts him against what is right , makes him a prey to the darker side of his nature. History show cases the end of a powerful persona either into the abyss of 'hell' or into a humble peaceful sels-actualised state of Life. Wonder what would a person do if has a lot of money but no power... two things...either he would 'buy' power and if he cannot , he might just drink to rags...and what would one do if he has enough power but no money...simple, I think he would make a lot of money and gain more power...I am often reminded of something a teacher once told us in our graduation '' a man of ethics would seem more a talker than a doer if he has no power , cos all he can do is talk and preach and not do as he does not have the money , power to get things done... but a man with money -power is consisdered a rare 'god' in himself though he may not have the ethics and the intention to do good...reason??? Simple... he 'throws' money...and things get done ! '' I sat there ... thinking as to where, have all the good people with no power, in this world gone...nowhere ...they have not gone anywhere...they are just there in their homes , work places, with their families, with their belongings...doing nothing...nothing 'cos some can 'not' and some would 'not'...I wonder what would become of, most of them once they get the 'power'...would they remain the same ...or would they give into the very power they wanted to posses to change the world around... tough qeustion to ask and to answer...hmm...think , think for yaself what would be the first thing you would wish if God gave you the power to make what u wish come true...something that u would want ? or something that ur family would , or may be just may be ...something that the world would need !!! Hmmm...u thinking hard aren't ya...please do so ...but don't ask me the same Q...I ain't thinking a thing as yet...as for now I take leave...think something good...cos power can just change the way u think....heheheheh...it has the power to do so...handle 'it' well, the world is yours !!! Rememeber 'with GREAT power comes GREATER responsibility ' er... the GREAT'er' is an addition for the resposibility !!! Adios ...Amigoz !

My mad what am I writting here !

2006-01-05T07:54:00.000-08:00

hello...not every day is like any other one ... am back at my writting again , had a hectic day , well... was busy ...lucky enough meet my parents who have dropped down to my working place...met a few relatives...work was fine ... its becoming more a paper and strategic based than a mere feild based. I am happy but quite unsure as to how much more should I know before I would believe that I am good enough...but hey enough of work already. Lets talk about Life ... its cool not bad but neither very entertaining as of now... not much time to freak out u know what I mean !!!! I often am tempted to lay down on the bed and think , THINK AND THINK... what must I be ...what should I achieve and what must I do... awww I guess I am asking too much from me ...but thats not bad either... sometimes I also think why the hell should I even think.. why not just go out there and 'WALK' ...walk on and walk never think never wonder, never ponder, and never look back!!! Just walk right ahead and u would find what u need ! Hahahah...I wonder what many of u, who would read this piece would say...I would wait ...and see what u got to tell...untill then U guys there take good care and have fun , Adios !

2006-01-04T00:20:00.000-08:00

I wonder what would have Lee Iacocca done when he first felt he was into a good job but also knew he was not totally equipped with the know-how...I feel confused, enthusiastic, hungry,impatient, ambitious but the sane part of me says' '' Basics first '' , thats what my immediate Boss and my Operational Boss have told me ...oh by the way I got three Bosses to report to... Quite unique ... well quite hectic and pathetic too , but even more challenging and yes...the best thing to have...after all how many guys/gurls in the world would work for an MNC , and have 3 bosses ... few...very few... I guess. Am I on my way to glory ...I don't know...but I am sure on my way to learning... Hello ppl ...I am Enigmatik...u can call me so...hehehe I pride myself at having been called so ...and this is my first diary page ...am on here working at the'' numbers'' as the bosses often call..after all they quip... NUMBERS are what make any man's working day quite fruitful ! Quite True !! I need to have my lunch now... guess you guys should too...see ya laterz...keep in touch...and YES pls do have fun...Life' s more about living than just working!!!